The Year of the Horse
Whilst coaching continued; creative production slowed down. It was another one of those times in life where you don’t realise you have been in the fog, until you appear on the other side of it. And that is why I have named this one The Year of the Horse, because from the end of 2025 until now it has felt like a baptism of fire, like growth was coming wanted or unwanted and as it often does at times it felt all consuming.
But, like the good times, the harder - more challenging times can’t stay constant. Ebbs and flows. Times of reaping and times of sowing. It really is to be expected. Everything in nature tells us that we need resistance for growth and I have always chased growth, so likelihood is I will find challenge is along for the ride.
Losing a really special family member to dementia in May was a crisis mode period, where the problem solving of schedules for hospital visits and as many creative ways as possible to support the people you love keeps you in full action mode. Even, when the goodbye comes - you are still in crisis mode. Then I decided to walk 60 miles for Dementia UK in June - and then July hit like a train. You suddenly realise it is actually an ending. A chapter of your life is closed because that person can’t ever be in it again physically. There are just so many finalities hit all at once like a wave.
Then you get back up (if you want to).
Get clear on your decided plan for what’s to go in the rest of your book - and start writing again (both literally and figuratively).
If you are about to get hit by the wave of life or you already were and you aren’t back on your feet yet - here is what I literally do and all I can say is, it helps me every time - the only variance is how long it takes to get me back on my feet.
Values - this helps me understand and reconnect with who I am and what I stand for - see the attached - Values List Resource if you want some prompts
If I could name the pain in one sentence what would it be. With the loss of a loved one it might be the sentence - I want them back or I don’t want a life without them. If you are having a hard time but it isn’t grief it might be something like - I am rubbish at everything. Literally, when you feel the pain you are feeling - what is the statement that accompanies it. If you can name the pain and acknowledge it you give yourself full permission and step back to observe and acknowledge it for what it is. You becoming aware and naming it allows a tiny bit of distance from being in it.
Next ask why 7 times for moving through layers to greater depths of understanding. For example - Why do I want them back? This would likely lead to - because I miss them then you ask why the 2nd time - Why do I miss them? I would answer this as - I miss sharing the experience of my life with them. 3rd time Why? Because we both loved and had such joy through the children. 4th Why? It felt like a beautiful mutual understanding of what makes life beautiful. 5th - Why do you miss that? I miss sharing that, I miss the connection. 6th Why? I feel less understood in the world and less loved I think without them here. Why does that matter to you - 7th time - Because I feel a little more like I need to be the one with the answers. The one who can be an adult and be the supporter rather than the supported.
It is not easy to do the 7 levels questioning but it will always lead you to somewhere you didn’t know you were going. The insight above makes a lot of sense to me, but might mean very little to you as you read it. When you do your own version don’t worry if some answers seem obvious. The movement through the process will expose belief systems which will show why it has hit you so hard.
Sometimes you may even feel that your life makes no sense in the form it is in now. Ask yourself as many questions as you can. Move the body as much as you can. Get outdoors as much as you can (grounding if you can). Reconnect with the you that was always there under the wave and trust that when you are ready you will stand back up and continue to offer your gifts to the world.
If, like me, you have felt that this year is a year where growth is coming to find you. Hold on. Trust yourself. You will come out the other side stronger.
Sarah x